College hazing can turn what should be an exciting opportunity to make friends and find your community into an experience that can put students at risk. Joining a sorority or fraternity, athletic team, student organization, club, campus ministry, or other group can be one of the best parts of college. Being part of a community can help you meet new people, discover interests, build confidence, and create friendships that last well beyond your college years.
But finding your people should never require you to compromise your safety, health, dignity, or values.
Find Your People
Starting college is a fresh start. You have the opportunity to meet people from different backgrounds, try new activities, and become involved in your campus community.
Getting involved can help you:
- Meet people who share your interests.
- Build friendships and a support system.
- Feel more connected to your campus.
- Develop leadership and teamwork skills.
- Try something new outside of your comfort zone.
- Create memories and experiences that can last a lifetime.
You don’t have to join a particular group because everyone else is doing it. Take the time to find organizations and people who make you feel comfortable being yourself.
The right group should make you feel welcomed—not pressured to prove yourself.
What Is College Hazing?
Hazing is any activity or behavior required or encouraged as part of joining, participating in, or maintaining membership in a group that humiliates, intimidates, threatens, or puts someone at risk.
College hazing isn’t always obvious. It doesn’t necessarily involve an activity that looks dangerous from the beginning. Sometimes it can start with something that seems harmless and gradually become more serious.
Hazing may include:
- Being pressured or forced to consume alcohol or drugs.
- Physical punishment or endurance activities.
- Sleep deprivation.
- Being forced to eat or drink something.
- Public humiliation or embarrassment.
- Sexual, degrading, or abusive activities.
- Isolation from friends, family, or other group members.
- Threats or intimidation.
- Being pressured to break the law or violate campus policies.
- Activities that could cause physical or emotional harm.
And remember: “Everyone does it” is never an excuse for hazing.
Neither is “It’s tradition,” “You have to do it to belong,” or “Don’t tell anyone.”
Pay Attention to the Warning Signs
Sometimes the warning signs of college hazing are less about one specific activity and more about how a group makes you feel.
Be cautious if you or a friend:
- Feel afraid to say no.
- Are told to keep activities secret.
- Are pressured to do something that makes you uncomfortable.
- Are told that refusing means you aren’t committed to the group.
- Are separated from friends or family.
- Are pressured to drink alcohol or take drugs.
- Are threatened with losing membership for refusing to participate.
- Feel embarrassed, degraded, or unsafe.
- Notice that members are expected to “earn” respect through harmful activities.
If you have to give up your safety to earn your place in a group, that’s not belonging.
Trust Your Gut
One of the most important safety skills you can develop in college is learning to recognize when something doesn’t feel right.
You don’t have to wait until something becomes dangerous before speaking up.
If you’re thinking, “This doesn’t feel right,” listen to that feeling.
You can leave. You can say no. You can call someone you trust. You can ask questions. And you can get help for yourself or a friend.
Wanting to fit in does not mean you have to participate in something that makes you uncomfortable or puts you at risk.
What If Your Friend Is Being Hazed?
A friend may be hesitant to tell you what is happening because they are afraid of losing their friends or their place in the group. They may also believe that what is happening is simply part of the process of joining.
Instead of judging them, let them know you’re there for them.
You can say:
“I’m concerned about you. You don’t have to go through this alone.”
Listen without blaming or criticizing them. Ask if they feel safe. If they are in immediate danger, don’t wait—call 911 or get emergency help.
You can also encourage your friend to talk with a trusted person on campus, such as a resident assistant, student affairs professional, campus police officer, counselor, or trusted faculty or staff member.
If possible, document what is happening, including dates, messages, photos, or other information that may be helpful when reporting the situation.
You Always Have the Right to Say No
Starting college can create a strong desire to fit in. You may worry that saying no will mean losing friends or missing out on an opportunity.
But people who truly care about you won’t require you to put yourself in danger to belong.
A healthy group will respect your boundaries. It will encourage you to take care of yourself. It will allow you to ask questions. And it won’t make you feel like you have to choose between your safety and your friendships.
Your safety is more important than fitting in.
Look Out for Each Other
At Rachael’s First Week, we believe that looking out for each other is one of the most important things you can do in college.
If you see something that doesn’t seem right, don’t assume someone else will step in.
Check on your friend. Ask if they’re okay. Stay with them if they need help. Speak up when something crosses the line. And if someone is in immediate danger, call 911.
Being an active bystander doesn’t mean you have to put yourself in danger. It means recognizing when someone may need help and taking a safe step to help.
Find a Group That Helps You Become Your Best Self
College should be a time when you discover who you are—not a time when someone else decides what you have to endure to belong.
Join groups. Make friends. Try new things. Get involved. Find your people.
But remember: a friendship, organization, team, fraternity, sorority, club, or any other group should never require you to sacrifice your safety, health, dignity, or values.
Look out for yourself. Look out for your friends. And Always Look Out For Each Other. 🩷
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